Virtual Pwnies

Virtual Pwnies
Delving into the overlooked world of horses in media and video games.

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Happy Valentines!

So Ralph Lauren sent a sample of their fragrance in the mail last year with this image on it.

Ok, cute.  A couple in love kissing on horseback.  A classic fairytale romance scene being used to market things towards women who were raised on Disney.

And I don't just mean the horses. :badum-ching!:
^I also just realized this illustrates the evolution of prince and equine bromance.

But let's look back at this original image.  Something just seemed off.  I was thinking this had to be a pair of models made to look like they're galloping through the grass while making out.  With a saddle hidden under the dress for stability, and a handler on the side Photoshopped out.  They can't possibly be moving.  Look at the tall grass used to hide the perfectly stationary legs!

I'm pretty sure there's an industrial fan somewhere too.

Well.  Unless there are some amazing Adobe After Effects at play, I was wrong.  This was a real photo-shoot for not only a print ad.  But a commercial.  These are models.  Those horses don't have handlers at side.  To bastardize a Matrix quote, "There is no saddle".  And they really are galloping, or at least loping, through that field of grass.  It's honestly refreshing that it wasn't faked like a magazine cover model's proportions.  However, this scene in real life wasn't as graceful or romantic as they want you to believe.

(Skip to 1:55 if you can't stomach the OMGZ guyz we're so in love!  Buy our stuff.)

Slow-mo makes everything look better.
I'm pretty sure she may have fallen off after the camera cuts out.

And there are some things you can't un-see.

So how should one go about kissing romantically, and a little safer, while on horseback?

I'll just let Wesley and Buttercup take it from here.

Happy Valentine's Day everybody!